22 Comments
User's avatar
Jasmine Kwan ❋'s avatar

this is beautiful

virelle's avatar

thank you <3

Raven in the Library's avatar

Your rhythm and words are absolutely beautiful and very comforting. You are very good at cradling your reader through shared uncomfortable feelings and when I get to the end, i feel I'm no longer neglecting that small part of me that needed light and attention.

virelle's avatar

i’m glad you noticed! i always try my best to make the ending a bit lighter since the topic is usually so heavy. it feels wrong to just leave it without any hope, if that makes sense. thank you for reading <3

Kate Otsuka's avatar

I love how you use metaphor in your writing.

virelle's avatar

thank you kate!

Velvet's avatar

that last line is actually so gorgeous - it really brings it all together

virelle's avatar

thank you so much!

YourBonusMom's avatar

This is beautiful and I relate to it deeply. I’m pushing 60, mother of a YA child, newly divorced from my second husband. The ache you describe is something that has haunted me most of my life but curiously it is fading now. I have a small circle of good friends. My mother is in her 80s and astoundingly has become the supportive, self-reflective person I needed 50 years ago. My father is dead. It is wild to find myself standing in the ruins of my life where the longing to be someone’s chosen was the mortar holding everything together, the drive behind everything I did. And life actually feels better without that desire. It’s a work in progress and I have no idea how the story ends.

virelle's avatar

this makes me so happy, i’m glad that it’s fading, and that you seem content. your mother showed up late, but better late than never 🤍 i wish you the best of luck and i hope life treats you well

Cecelia Walden's avatar

This is going to sound sarcastic, but I mean it quite genuinely. You should get a dog.

virelle's avatar

i have two cats! and one of them loves me so much, he’s a clinger and it’s almost the same as having a dog. this is more about family & friendships

مريم's avatar

Heart wrenching piece. Your words are very touching. Thank you ✨🤍

virelle's avatar

thank you!! i’m so glad you liked it <3

Lillian Kennedy's avatar

this is beautifully written <3

ayah ayoosh's avatar

Oh ,how reading this made me seen like never before😭. I have never read anything like this which exactly captured the ache within me.

Jodie Jones's avatar

Fuck this hit where it hurts. There’s a kind of grief in noticing the small things: the way someone’s eyes light up faster for another name, the subtle shift in tone when they talk about someone else, how you become the one who listens rather than the one they can’t stop thinking about.

And yet, there’s power in what you wrote at the end: choosing yourself, learning to be your own favourite when the world feels slow to hand you that place. It’s messy, and it doesn’t erase the longing overnight, but maybe it does build something quieter and sturdier. A belonging that doesn’t vanish when someone else walks away.

zoe's avatar

this was such a good read!! especially the last bit of imagery, “my shadow stretching across the threshold while my feet remain on the porch” captured the idea of the essay so perfectly and was written so well 🤍

Maria Evangelin's avatar

Brought me to tears, thank you for this🤍

viviana's avatar

LOVED this Virelle!!!

Camelia's avatar

as much as the world tells us our worth is measured in other's thoughts about us, and often times we do believe it as you have put it so aptly in words, let me affirm u that we can truly choose ourselves 🙏 God bless you, thank you for writing!

Sam's avatar

Wow, just wow.